My father walked to school, 4'oclock every morning. With no shoes on. Up a hill, both ways in 5 feet of snow, and he was thankful. - Bill CosbyMy mother was an authority on pigsties. This is the worst looking pigsty I've ever seen in my life. - Bill Cosby
You know I brought you in this world, I'll take you out. - Bill Cosby
You know my father's favorite game? "Come here and pull my finger." - Bill Cosby
Oba kaybe - Bill Cosby
Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry. - Bill Cosby
As I have discovered by examining my past, I started out as a child. Coincidentally, so did my brother. My mother did not put all her eggs in one basket, so to speak: she gave me a younger brother named Russell, who taught me what was meant by "survival of the fittest." - Bill Cosby
Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home. - Bill Cosby
An American can eat anything on the face of this earth as long as he has two pieces of bread. - Bill Cosby
Parents are not interested in justice, they're interested in peace and quiet. - Bill Cosby
When you become senile, you won't know it. - Bill Cosby
You see a long time ago before you were born, I prayed that God would give me a son to carry on the family name. And you were born. And I've watched you do things. And many times I've wanted to ask you not to tell anyone who you are. - Bill Cosby
Look, I'm not going to put pressure on the boy. If he's good... Great. If he's bad... If he quits, he's dead. - Bill Cosby
Try to be rational? I'll tell you how rational I can be. I hope that he goes out into the wilderness and gets poision ivy, and comes back and I have to treat him then he will find out how much sick people get charged. - Bill Cosby
A pelican that is wet walks with a gated limp, but a dry fish swims alone. - Bill Cosby
Women don't want to hear what you think. Women want to hear what they think. - Bill Cosby
What's your name again? That's right. I'm so glad you know your name. - Bill CosbyAfter you take off your coats, go to sleep... Then in the morning I'll take you all home. - Bill Cosby
Repeat after me. I promise not to run outside of the house. I promise not to run inside of the house. I promise not to touch, pick up, step on, anything that looks interesting. - Bill Cosby
It says here that you are a compulsive gambler and that you are wanted by the police. Is this correct? - Bill Cosby
Have you ever had a cookie? Then you won't get any here either. - Bill Cosby
You have the triptopanaseas. - Bill Cosby
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